yup

Happy Sunday
Yesterday we rode back from Bongolo and had a great ride back. We were passing through a little village and stopped something on the side of the rode and our hired driver, Rueban, stopped and backed up to show us what it was. One of the villagers had just killed a ten foot snake. Hopefully if this post posts correctly you will be able to see it, but we will see how the internet is feeling today. This thing was HUGE and the guy had just killed it. I am pretty sure it was the largest snake I have ever seen. Bigger than anything zoo snake or those cool ones they bring to school on animal day (remember those?). This thing came from the jungles where we were just living. If you have been keeping up with this you know I lived in Bongolo for about a month so to think that animals like that were in my backyard....a little creepy? Yea....Funny side story about snakes. Papa Tim was telling us about this missionary he knew who was moving from Gabon to another country to do missions and they didn't want to give up their pet snake, so...they wore it as a belt on the plane. Um yea. Its exactly what you are thinking...anyway so after we saw the snake we came up to this police stop where they pulled us over. The police officer came up to our car and I started laughing. He wanted to see everyone's passports and the copy that I had had some weird numbers on it from a game we were playing, so that set me off. I could not stop laughing. The officer was drunk so he found it humorous that I was laughing and kept smiling at me all weird. Then he started explaining to us that Tupac was his dad and I completely lost it. Everyone kept telling me to shut the heck up because we were all going to get put in African jungle jail, and then Allison was laughing right along with me. I don't know why I couldn't stop laughing, but I was dying! It was so funny and when the thought crossed my mind that I could be put in prison, I laughed even harder! Anyway, no worries though mom, I am still here and not in jail :). So we got home last night and went to church this morning at Pastor Jacobs church. We got invited over to his sisters house for a huge family dinner party. It was INSANE. On the way there we had a family sing along in the car and our choice was Disney. So we all were screaming Disney songs the entire way to the party. We were laughing SO hard at how ridiculous the whole thing was. It was wonderful. We got there later in the evening and we just strolled in being typical Americans thinking this was the coolest place in the universe, because simply we are in African and regardless to where you go its the coolest place in the universe, so we walk in and see a huge live band playing with at least six back up singers and this women in the middle of the yard leading them. We find a seat on the porch as before we could understand what the heck was going on we had made this gigantic dance circle in the yard. We danced for I don't even remember how long, but it was amazing. SO much fun. It wasn't just dancing either, we were dancing to all African worship music. We laughed, danced and laughed some more at how ridiculous we looked. That is one of my favorite things about missions is how you don't have to worry about looking like a fool because no one cares. In America we are so concerned with looking good and not looking like a complete fool, but if I do remember correctly David danced naked in front of God. Some people would say, and actually most other cultures betray Americans this way, that we are to stuck up to do something like that or that we are better than to ever do something as silly. That may be part of it, but I also think it has something to do with we are not comfortable in our own skin. We are so self conscience that we have put up this block in our minds that we are better, but really it stems from being self conscience. Any who, we ate dinner, chilled for a little longer and then left. On the way home, we had another family singalong, but this time it was sappy sad/happy love songs. Hilarious. Then we came home, debriefed (we have a BUSY next couple of weeks so it might be hard for me to blog or keep constant contact with you guys but I only have two and half weeks left so its ok) and then watched a family movie. I just woke up but I am going to attempt to write something about Moses so here we go....

Ok, I left off by going in the darkness where God was using Christ as our light (not sure I mentioned that part but I am now so its whatever). Now Moses has been up on Sinai with God for a while giving him Laws. We have eleven chapters where Moses was with God directly on mount Sinai. I am not sure if the amount of actual time was given and I'm sure I could look it up, but that's not the point. He was with God for a while. The Israelites get a little (understatement) impatient while waiting for Moses to come back from spending time with God, so they have a little tempter tantrum and demand that Aaron make them a god to worship. As I was rereading this just now I got this sick feeling because of what the Israelites say next... “He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, 'This is your god, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt'”- Ex 32:4...WHAT? Are you kidding me? This calf brought you out of Egypt? How about we give praise where its due all the time instead of when something incredible just happens, but that we consistently remember who gives us the breath in our lungs, and who rescued us from Egypt.
In an attempt to look up what the golden calf symbolized, I sort of came to a dead end, one because there was a ton of Egyptian symbolism which was tricky to fully comprehend, two the internet is slow this morning so doing research would take to long and three its early and we all know how well I do in the morning so I sort of came to a dead end, but this is what I found. I figured that they had just come from living in Egypt for a long time, generations long actually, and so they must have adopted some of their ways and teachings. So I looked up the meaning of the calf in Egyptian culture of the time and found that the calf was the strongest and most important of the sacred animals. It also symbolized wealth. I cant really put it together at the moment hahaha so if you have a clue, please share. That's not really what I have planned for this anyway.
My focus is going to be on the situation as a whole. Here is the scenario, Moses just spent a ton of time with God up on the mountain. God spoke to Moses for eleven chapters long as I mentioned and after the law was given God tells him its time for him to go back down to where the people were because they have gotten out of hand. “Then the Lord said to Moses, 'Go down, because your people, whom you brought up out of Egypt, have become corrupt. They have been quick to turn away from what I commanded them and have made themselves an idol cast in the shape of a calf. They have bowed down to it and sacrificed to it and have said, 'These are your gods, O Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt” Exodus 32:7-8.
When I read this it sort of caught me off guard. Now don't be offended by this but I feel like this is how its going to be for me. Not that anyone of you back home are Israelites or worshiping false idols, but just imagine what this is like for Moses. He was just in God's presence for a long time. He was in the middle of what God had for him and had just come back from a specific time that God had set aside for Moses. Some people will argue and say this is how life is, but I think its a little different. God sought out Moses to give him the law. He set special time aside for him at this point in his life. God has given me and the rest of the interns a three month journey into what he is doing in Gabon. We have met with God face to face while being here and now we are coming down from the mountain. We are coming home to what is familiar to us and to deal with people who have no experienced what we just experienced. This situation gets a little tricky because Moses gets pissed, melts the calf into a powder and makes the Israelites drink it. I am not going to make you guys drink a melted calf or get angry because you don't understand what I have just been through. But this is my heart in the matter and as the weeks are winding down and we have about 17 days left, we are beginning to come down from the mountain and back to people who we haven't seen in three months. People who haven't seen the things we have seen.
On the flip side, I also understand my role in this. I am coming home to a place where life has gone on and moved forward. To a church, school, household, friends and family that has lived while I have been away. I understand my role in this is to not judge, or be cold-hearted and just get frustrated because you don't understand. But rather my role is to share with you what I have just experienced. Moses was given the law to go tell the Israelites. I have had the amazing opportunity of spending three months in Gabon. I am in no way shape or form saying God is more at work here or there, or that I am Moses and am this amazing prophet. Please don't think that I would ever say that. I am just saying that God has dealt with me in a more personal and deeper level that I have ever seen him work. My life style, ways of thinking, approach to life and love has all been questioned, torn apart and shredded this summer and even with the few of you I have been talking to, I have withheld because some of it is just to hard to explain. I know that Satan wants me to keep quiet though, so regardless to if you understand, I will be shouting what God has taught me from the rooftops while walking into the darkness where He is. I don't want to live this normal christian life anymore. Its time to get radical for a change and actually live as if Christ is real.